Hi gang.It's me again, Dr. Mel Silver. I hope now that Thanksgiving is over, you'll consider making an appointment with your local dentist (and if you happen to live in or near Beverly Hills, that would be yours truly.) All those pies can really erode your enamel.
Speaking of sugary pies, now it's December, and you all know what that means! Time for a new Dental Hygienist of the Month! You might be asking yourself why I'm qualified to judge this category, especially since nowadays the people in this line of work like to call themselves dental assistants. Well, it's like I always tell my son David: I'm the third best oral surgeon in Los Angeles, and I'm old school. I also call flight attendants "stewardesses." Sue me. You can't teach an old dog new tricks, and boy, am I a dog.
That brings me to the other reason I'm qualified to select the creme de la creme of the world's most able oral care specialists: I'm a TOTAL pussy hound. Unfortunately, my weakness for a barely legal, vocationally-trained woman flossing someone else's pearly whites has ruined all my marriages. And as long as I'm single, I might as well appreciate all the beauty that this glorious profession has to offer.
Enter Miss December. She's a little older than my usual choice of hygienist, but I think you can all agree with me that she has so much style and class I can overlook her cougar status. Her name is Maria, and she was on an incredibly tasteful television program called "Rock of Love Bus." So she's not only an oral master, she's also a storied entertainer. Truly a Renaissance dental hygienist. She can massage my gums anytime.
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